“A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way."

Have you ever been punched in the face? Plucked a duck? Wooed a woman in another language? Joined the army? Sailed across the ocean? Stood firmly on principle? Written a poem? Risen to the occasion? Quoted the inimitable Mark Twain?

THE OFFICIAL OLD'S COOL WICKED/SMART EDUCATION is our attempt at a know-it-all guide to the really important things in life, and is filled with practical, old-school basics, some hero worship, and the art of living well. We believe you can't buy character — you need to go out into the world and make something of yourself fer chrissakes. This how-to’ll help you do just that, with class, nerve, and verve.

Our HANDBOOK, BLACK BOOK and READ BOOK are 60+ pages each. Handy 3 1/2" x 5 1/2" size so you can carry them anywhere: pocket, purse, glove box, backpack, head. Rugged and reliable 100 lb protective and minimalist cover.

Priceless treasures inside; optional brown papr package tied up with strings gift-wrap.

All three together just twenny clams – cheap college tuition, that – or buy two sets and get the third set FREE.

A Gentlemanly Selection

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